What is phileo love in the Bible?

Love is a central theme throughout the Bible, but the ancient Greek language—used in the New Testament—has several different words to describe various kinds of love. Among these, "phileo" stands out as one of the most significant, yet it is often overshadowed by the more well-known "agape" love. Understanding what phileo love means can deepen our appreciation for the richness of relationships depicted in Scripture and inform how we live out our faith today.

Defining Phileo Love

Phileo (pronounced fil-eh'-o) is one of the primary Greek words used for love in the New Testament. It expresses a strong affection, fondness, or friendship between people. Unlike agape, which is often described as selfless, unconditional love, phileo love is relational and emotional. It reflects the warmth and companionship found in close friendships and family ties.

Phileo is sometimes translated as “brotherly love.” The city of Philadelphia, for example, takes its name from this word, meaning “the city of brotherly love.” While agape love is often associated with God’s perfect love for humanity, phileo is the love that binds friends, siblings, and companions together.

Biblical Examples of Phileo Love

The New Testament contains several examples of phileo love in action. One of the most touching is the friendship between Jesus and Lazarus. In John 11:3, Lazarus’s sisters send word to Jesus, saying, “Lord, the one you love (phileo) is sick.” Here, phileo describes the deep affection Jesus had for his friend. Later, in John 11:36, after Jesus wept at Lazarus’s tomb, the people remarked, “See how he loved (phileo) him!”

Another important passage is John 21:15–17, where the resurrected Jesus asks Peter three times if he loves Him. The first two times, Jesus uses the word agape, but Peter responds with phileo, expressing a heartfelt, brotherly affection. On the third time, Jesus also uses phileo, meeting Peter at his level of honest emotion. This exchange highlights the importance of both agape and phileo love in relationships with God and others.

Paul’s letters also reference phileo love. In Titus 3:15, Paul writes, “Everyone with me sends you greetings. Greet those who love (phileo) us in the faith.” This demonstrates the value placed on affectionate bonds within the Christian community.

How Phileo Differs from Other Loves

The Greeks used several words for love, including eros (romantic or sexual love), storge (familial love), agape (unconditional divine love), and phileo (friendship or brotherly love). Each word captures a unique aspect of human relationships. Phileo is distinct because it centers on mutual affection, friendship, and shared experiences.

Unlike agape, which can be extended even to enemies or those who do not reciprocate, phileo thrives in environments of shared trust and loyalty. It is the love that makes friendships flourish, that encourages support and empathy, and that fosters community.

The Importance of Phileo Love in Christian Life

While the Bible calls believers to practice agape love with everyone, it also recognizes the importance of deep, affectionate bonds. Jesus Himself modeled phileo love with His disciples, cultivating genuine friendships and emotional connections. These relationships provided support, encouragement, and accountability.

Phileo love plays a vital role in the health of the church and the Christian life. It is seen in acts of kindness, words of encouragement, and the joy of doing life together. The early church is described in Acts 2:42–47 as a community marked by fellowship, shared meals, and mutual support—hallmarks of phileo love.

Growing in Phileo Love

To grow in phileo love means to invest in meaningful relationships, to show genuine affection, and to be present in the lives of others. It involves listening, encouraging, and sometimes simply sharing life’s joys and sorrows. Phileo love reminds us that faith is not just an individual journey, but a shared adventure with others.